So there's been a proposal, and acceptance maybe some tears, hugging and brief chats about what sort of wedding you both want. Then maybe your thoughts turn to who you want to invite. And then you realise you've entered the mindfield.
There's no doubt for many couples choosing who goes on the guest list is a tricky one. There's the people you want to invite, the people you 'have' to invite and then there's the people feel you should invite. Common scenarios I 've heard:
I haven't spoken to her for x years but we used to be best friends.
I was a bridesmaid at her wedding x years ago even though we don't speak much anymore.
I don't know hum anymore but we speak on facebook sometimes
etc etc etc
Now in an ideal world we'd invite exactly who we want (striking off the list your fiance's pervy great uncle and your aunt you know will hate your choices - 'ooh why did she choose lilies, roses are more romantic...'). But when it comes to trying not to upset the people we care about we sometimes have to compromise.
And that's pretty much the point. If you're not sure about inviting someone and it will make someone close to you (sister, mother, fiance) happy if you do or don't then use that as your guideline.
But when it comes to friends and acquaintances you're not that close too I'd advise thinking about the following:
- will they enhance your day - in other words will you enjoy them being there?
- do you want to see them after your wedding and regret the fact you've grown apart?
If the answer to both these questions isn't a resounding yes then I'd think twice before inviting said person.
Of course there's no easy way to choose who to invite to your wedding but it's handy to remember every guest you invite costs you money that could be saved or spent elsewhere. So check your motives when adding someone on your list and remember at the end of the day it's your day so you should pretty much get things your way!
We showed our guest list for Ireland to the in-laws while they were visiting, and they only suggested two more people. It was amazing. It may be premature, but I'm thinking we may actually be able to pull off a 100 person only wedding in Ireland. UNHEARD OF.
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ReplyDeleteI couldn't agree more! Ive been to hundreds of weddings as a wedding photographer, now we're planning ours Im keeping it beautiful and intimate with just our nearest and dearest.... although were having an after party in a pub the next day, which is for lots of friends!!
Sounds like good advice to me!
ReplyDeleteGlad you all agree!
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