Tuesday, 23 November 2010
When is the 'right time' to have babies?
Apologies here for the somewhat dramatic nature of this post. I felt it was a suitable way to jump start my Tuesday!
Weddings and babies seem to go hand in hand. Probably because for many people having children is the next logical step after getting married.
Like many late twenty somethings, (yes okay, I'm 30 at the end of next year) I have pondered this question of the 'right' time to have bambinos. I love children and definitely want them. When, I'm not quite sure, and being recently single it doesn't exactly look likely for a while ;)
And there's so many questions surrounding having children.
How will I know if I'm going to be a good mum? How will I balance running my own business and raising a family? Will I still exist after I give birth or will I forever be know as mum?
And how long am I allowed to live without thinking about it? Will I turn into one of those, oh I so hate the word, desperate women, who feels like she's running out of time.
Urgh. What horrible thoughts!
It's a sad fact about womanhood that we can't physically have babies forever and because of that truth, will definitely look at our lives and wonder when we should have children, when the right time will be, and whether we'll even be able to. Yes. I am jealous of men in this regard. Charlie Chaplin anyone?
And it seems you're not even off the hook if you're married. I have a few married, so far childless friends who are always been asked when they're going to pop out a couple of sprogs. Questions which they feel defensive and slightly p***ed off about.
I think my point is that getting older and thinking about babies is hard. At 18, 21, 24 I thought about it, but in an abstract way. As I approach the big three-oh it's on my mind a bit more. I'm quite envious of my friends that know they don't want children. How lovely it must be to be sure. You can plan your future much easier in that regard.
Even me with my planning skills can't know the future. I might steal Jolie's crown as international adopter of a beautiful rainbow of children, I might have just one of my own or I might never have children. Whatever ends up happening, I'll get on with things and make the best of the cards I've been dealt. As that's all any of us can do really, and I guess that's part of the wonder and beauty of life.
What are your thoughts then on the whole 'baby thing'?